Sock-Less For Summer

Going sock-less this summer? I can give you some tips on how to do it right. It takes a little training. 
The Europeans have been going sock-less since shoes were invented, however here in America we tend to be a little less daring. Going sock-less can be not only comfortable but a very sexy look. There are those who think that a bit of ankle showing in a man can be very sexy.

Here are some basic tips that will make it a better experience for you:

Wash your feet: The reason why your shoes stink when you don’t wear socks is because a bacteria called brevibacterium that eats the dead skin that sheds off your feet. This is what creates that awful smell. So wash your feet well with an anti-bacterial soap - most soaps are - scrub your feet with a terry cloth and make sure to scrub well between your toes. This will get rid of all the dead skin.

Make sure you do the basics: Use cedar shoe trees and don’t wear the same pair of shoes every day. Sweat will soak into the leather of your shoes, and if you don’t give them time to dry out, you’ll not only wear down the leather faster, but you’ll also stink up your feet more.

 Know when you can go sock-less: You can go sock-less for any occasion except formal business affairs, For the most part, avoid wearing socks with shorts unless they are ankle socks or you are one trendy-hip-cool-cat who wears knee socks. Also know what types of shoes go best with a sock-less look: boat shoes, loafers, moccasins, saddle shoes, bucks, chukkas, tennis shoes and even Oxford shoes. Boots are the only shoes I would not wear sock-less.

Put something in your shoe: Unless you are one of those people whose feet don't sweat, you need to put something in your shoe. Talcum powder. I use Johnson & Johnson Baby Powder. Sprinkle freely inside the shoe before putting it on. The powder will absorb the sweat and any smells associated with it. Terry cloth insoles. Kiwi makes a good one and you can buy them at any Rite-Aid, or CVS type stores. No show socks. These are those short little feet wrap - my name for them - that go up to just below the ankles.
 Know how to get rid of odors: You can always throw sneakers or any canvas shoe in your washing machine - but leave the room cause it is quite a noisy experience. You can also do the ancient remedy of stuffing the shoes with newspapers and leave them out in the sun. But my favorite is Odor-Eater Sneaker Spray, which is fast efficient and a very easy process.

I hope by now you have all the information you need to go out there wearing sock-less shoes and feeling empowered and sexy. If you have never done this give it a shot, see how you feel, then come back and tell me all about it. I'm curious to hear how it goes for you! 

The Electrifying Energy of NY City

What is it about NY city that is so stimulating and vibrant?
I guess the obvious answer would be; its electrifying energy.
Yes of course it is, but what creates that energy?

I can not think of another place I have visited in my lifetime - and I have traveled my fair share - that includes in its demographic a more diverse group of ethnicity and nationalities. Segregation is completely absent in NYC. Is as if NYC is color blind.

At any given moment - in a cab, riding the subway, buying the newspaper, attending the theater, walking in Central Park, sweating at Equinox, eating at a restaurant anywhere in the city, on the Starbucks line, etc - you are surrounded by at least three to four different age, ethnicity and socioeconomic demographics. All converging at the same place at the same time for a common goal. Everyone gets along and if they don't....well, then they are quick to express it and move on. And when I say "not get along" I'm not talking about any sort of prejudice; I am referring to somebody budding in line, or getting shoved due to overcrowding, or a taxi driver driving too slow along the busy city streets - this perhaps the worst crime of all. Every day people having every day experiences.

Rich, poor, young or old, everyone in NYC gets to do the same thing. No one is spared because of any social distinction. To get from point A to point B in the city you must either, have your chauffeur drive you, take a taxi, ride the subway, take a bus, ride a bike or walk, but everyone gets to experience the city in one way or another. Is as if there are no special privileges for the residents of NYC. Yes if you are part of the more affluent crowd, you may have a doorman in your building that opens the door for you and is ready with an umbrella to protect you from the rain, but everyone gets to step in the puddle and walk on their own two feet at some point.

There's also a real sense of honesty about the way New Yorkers interact with one another which makes for a genuine experience no matter where you are in the city. What you see is what you get.

After many years in NYC I have relocated to Los Angeles - a decision I am very happy with and my love for LA grows every day. Upon my arrival in LA I remember being astonished about two very obvious issues.

First of all, after being in LA for a week, I asked my then roommate Tim;
Where are the black people?
I could have included any ethnicity to that question since all I kept seeing everywhere I went were white people. In order to find any diversity I had to go outside of LA. It was extremely segregated and divisive. Unfortunately everyone had their own designated community and the various lifestyles were not meant to be mixed. This was very shocking to me.

Second of all, I was floored by the fact that everyone would smile and wish me a nice day or ask how my day was. Who were these freaks? And why did they care about my well being? I soon realized that it was - and is - just a way of exercising politeness but to a New Yorker like myself it took months to get to that place of acceptance.

So I guess what creates that electrifying energy that is NY city is its people.
This hotchpotch of ethnicity and walks of life all coming together for a common purpose; to thrive in the city that never sleeps. 

So is NY city the prototype for the perfect world? A world where everyone is welcomed, differences are respected and honest expressions of self abound without the fear of being ostracised ? Hmmm, something to think about!

I visit NY city a couple of times a year for many reasons but the main reason is its electrifying energy. When I am in NY city is as if I am getting a lifeblood transfusion. Energy, inspiration, drive and confidence rush through my veins when I'm here and so I take that with me wherever I go.

Perhaps in my heart, I will always be a New Yorker.

I Look Just Like My Dad

The older I get the more I look like my dad. Sometimes when I catch my reflection in a mirror as I am walking down the street I see him and not me.

The high forehead. The pronounced and not very hairy eyebrows. The deep set eyes that could so easily be surrounded by dark circles at the slightest absence of sunlight on my face. The big imperfect nose. The big ears that suddenly feel like they continue to grow at a time when the rest of my body has stopped that process. Even the tone of my voice has started to remind me of my old man.

Dad passed away in 92 as I was sitting by his hospital bedside holding his hand. Best gift I have ever received. His passing forever changed the course of my life.

I was/am an only son of a seamstress/party girl mother and big band singer/barber father. Growing up in with these two characters was so many different things, some of which were not great but some were absolutely magical.

It was my dad whom as soon as I was able to stand on my own two feet, would have me stand on his shoes and grab on to his legs while he summoned my mom to come join him as they partner danced to the most rhythmic of sounds that was emanating from the cheap record player in the living-room of our one bedroom apartment in Havana. Orquesta Aragon was playing and the vibe was good. I remember laughing and bopping up and down as they danced with me in the middle. I knew how to dance before I could even walk.

It was my dad who would whistle everyday as he entered the house so as to announce - just for me - his arrival. To this day whenever I hear that very specific puckered-lips soft whistle I can envision my dad coming through the front door of our home in Vedado, Havana Cuba.

It was my dad who taught me how to always be well dressed. He taught me how to maintain the center pleats on my pants. Always fold or hang your clothes when you take them off. He taught me that a comb should always live in my front shirt or coat pocket so as to stay perfectly combed at all time.

Dad taught me multiplication tables the year that he walked me to and from kindergarten every day.

He taught me how to play the bongos, el guiro, las maracas and las claves.

He introduced me - through old films - to the great Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, Yvette Mimieux, Gina Lollobrigida, Burt Lancaster and Tony Curtis and taught me respect for the artists and their work.

It was my dad whom with tears in is eyes after my first ballet dance recital in Miami at the age of 16, told me that I had talent and that I must never give up. He also told me that opportunity would always knock and my job is to always be ready.

He made me my first drink - rum and coke - and I had my first drink with him.

He showed me with his actions that we are all equal in life and that no one deserves to be treated with anything less that kindness compassion and acceptance.

My dad suffered with Lou Gehrig's disease for many years. Lou Gehrig's disease - or ALS - is a disorder that slowly destroys all motor function, leaving the intellect and rational intact. Think of it as sort of a human cell. Quite ironic for a man who had lived his entire life free as a bird.

I knew I was gay at an early age and as for my mother's urging I was never to tell my dad. "It will kill him " she said. Keep in mind hat we are Cubans after all and drama is the fire that fuels our way of life.

By the time I mustered enough courage to come out to my dad, he had lost his ability to speak in words. However words were not necessary for me to see how he felt about my big secret.

As I started to reveal my truth to him, he began to smile. As I continue my confession, tears started to roll down his cheeks. By the end all he could do was lift his arms up, signaling with his hands for me to come in for a hug. As he held me tighter than he ever had in his fatherly embrace he struggled to uttered these words:

"Te quiero mi hijo"

These were not exactly enunciated words but a collection of beautiful distorted sounds that I will forever cherish.

I think of my dad every day. Lately I have been really wanting to sit down and talk to him. On this particular Father's Day, I not only want to honor him, but I feel the need to share him with you. If you know me, you now know me a little bit more intimately. If you don't know me, I want you to know my dad cause he was a man worth knowing and if you ever meet me, try and picture him through me.

In the years since my fathers passing, I have gone through a profound transformation that has absolutely revolutionized the person I was and allow me to start to become the man I am today. I continue to grow with complete confidence and trust that though I may not be able to sit down and talk to my dad in person, in my heart my old man and I will forever be in constant dialogue. I am who am I am because of my dad. 

Feliz dia de los padres mi viejo. Te quiero siempre. Gracias por todo!

NeriumAD Magic in a Bottle.

Who needs Botox or preventive plastic surgery when you have NeriumAD?

I know that sounds like a total headline, and in some way it is.

I was approached recently by my friend Cody Montarbo who shared with me about this product called NeriumAD. Cody has his own line of skin products -Montarbo Skin Care - which I have used in the past and I still recommend. He had been using NeriumAD himself and his skin was flawless. Now Cody is significantly younger than me so I was not overwhelmingly impressed by his pitch. However since I value and respect his opinion, he got my attention and I was intrigued. I asked to use NeriumAD for a month as he suggested so I could see for myself.

Here is the result:

I decided to document the process in the hopes of sharing it with all of you, IF indeed this NeriumAD product proved to be effective. I enlisted the talents of my dear friend and photographer David Arenas to take the before and after pictures. 

You can see for yourself the kind of results I obtained from using NeriumAD for 30 days.

Notice how the creases between my eyes diminished.

The lines on my forehead are almost unnoticeable. 

The age spots on the side of my forehead decreased significantly.

The bags under my eyes smooth out enough to create the illusion of my eye being lifted. 

But the most exciting result for me was that my skin started to become as taut as it was years ago, which at the end of the day is what allows for a more youthful appearance.

Now I didn't alter my face, nor did I lose movement or elasticity on my skin. There was no poking or cutting, no injections or swelling. No recovery period to endure and absolutely no pain whatsoever.

My goal was not to alter my appearance. My goal was to look fresh and rejuvenated which in turn allows me to look better not just to you, but also to myself when I look in the mirror every morning.

You know my philosophy by now. The act of putting ourselves together at he beginning of the day, every day, is the most important part of our day. Once we like what we see in the mirror, it will inevitably inform how we go through the rest of our day.

NeriumAD has helped that morning process tremendously. 

What is Nerium?
During advanced research on the uses of the Nerium oleander plant, an accidental discovery was made: the unique properties of Nerium oleander provided remarkable age-defying results when applied to the skin. This finding led to the creation of the NeriumAD skincare line.

Nerium scientists developed a breakthrough process, NBio-PL2, to extract from the Nerium oleander plant in a way that preserves its unique and beneficial properties. This patent-pending extraction process yields the NAE-8 extract used to formulate this first-of-its-kind age-defying product line.

For more information regarding NeriumAD please contact Cody Montarbo at:

montarboskincare@gmail.com or by phone at 1 (619) 621-1658

I know you will be happy you did!