Giving a compliment can be much easier than accepting one.
From as far back as I can remember I was taught to be polite and say thank you whenever anyone said something nice about me. As soon as I was able to formulate complete sentences whenever an adult would say something complimentary to me, my mom would immediately say:
“Que se dice” – translation – “What do you say?”
And I knew that was my cue to lower my eyes and say
“Gracias” – translation – “Thank you”
Well something change along the journey from little boy to man.
I am very quick to compliment my friends and even strangers on the street on the way they look. I truly enjoy complimenting people cause I know it makes them feel good and it may even be that one moment in the day when everything is OK for them. However receiving the compliment is a little different for me.
I find myself doing one of two things, either I feel embarrassed and think they are just being nice at which point I say things like:
“Really, I’m having the worst hair day” or “OMG I feel so fat today, I’m just hiding it well”
Doing this is basically calling the compliment giver a liar. This is such an arrogant and ungrateful stance on my part when I really don’t feel that way.
The other response when I receive a compliment is guilt and I find myself down playing it by saying things like
“Oh I got this at the Outlet for 80% off” or “I don’t even wear this anymore, I just put it on today”
The one response that I find most challenging is the simple and polite “Thank you”
At the end of the day I’m sure that is all anyone really wants to hear - is all I want to hear when I give a compliment. A very simple thank you will do just fine and show my appreciation.
I promise you, my dear Blogettes, that I will be aware of my response to compliments from now on and practice those two very difficult words in the English language:
Thank you!
If you can relate and have your own responses, please share them with me, I would love to hear how you handle compliments!
I have always had issues with compliments and receiving them. One thing that changed my perspective was some thing a therapist said to me. "When someone gives you a compliment it is a gift" When I in-turn discount the compliment, it is like saying, "I don't like your gift and am going to be-little it" Really a pretty shitty thing to do when you think about it!
ReplyDeleteHugs, Geoff
Thank you for this posting!
ReplyDeleteWell said Vincent!
ReplyDelete